Making Way

Crafting A Vibrant Life

• Melissa Park / Jasmine Griffin-Baum • Season 5 • Episode 67

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When the vibrant energy of the New York fashion scene meets the tranquil beauty of floral design, magic happens. Jasmine Griffin-Baum, our guest this week, shares her extraordinary transformation from fashion maven to florist extraordinaire. Her journey is a testament to the power of authenticity and the courage it takes to follow one's true calling, even when it means leaving the familiar behind. As Jasmine unfolds her story, we traverse the emotional landscapes of identity, creativity, and the bold decision to embrace a life that's genuinely fulfilling.

Embarking on a transformative path requires more than just a leap of faith—it demands resilience, adaptability, and an unwavering commitment to personal values. Through Jasmine's eyes, we witness the struggles and triumphs of navigating a career in the cutthroat fashion industry, the humbling switch to education, and finally, the birth of a passion-fueled floral business. Her candid reflections on the importance of balance, well-being, and aligning work with inner truths resonate deeply, offering a guidepost for anyone yearning to craft their own journey of self-discovery.

This conversation is a celebration of the human spirit's ability to bloom in adversity and the joy of crafting a life that honors one's essence. Jasmine's experiences highlight the significance of community, networking, and the role of generosity in both personal and professional spheres. Her story isn't just one of change; it's a narrative of success through openness, hospitality, and a steadfast belief in the beauty of dreams. Join us for an episode that isn't just inspiring but a vivid mosaic of what it means to truly live a life that's as unique and vibrant as the most exquisite bouquet.

👉 Check out Jasmine's business Kinda Formal 🌸

Thank you for listening!

Do you know someone or have a topic you would like featured on the podcast? Leave a review and let me know! I'd love to hear from you!


Melissa:

Hello, welcome to Making Way everyone. I am your host, melissa Park. We are back. I've been having some great conversations that I am super excited to share with you. Okay, are you ready? Let's go. I've been thinking about something recently, or maybe longer than just recently. I started this podcast adventure thinking I wanted to hear from older people, like older than 65. I was looking for guidance, purpose wisdom, but what I quickly came to realize is that the world they are referencing is not the world we are in today. In fact, it's quite far. And, yes, principles do cross over and apply in a lot of circumstances, but the world feels different. Think about how much has changed in the last 30 years the internet, smartphones, podcasts, hello. Millennials are coming of age in a very different time than our parents. So who do we turn to for advice? How do people live today To feel happy, fulfilled, safe, inspired? I don't believe there is one right answer, but I do believe we can learn.

Jasmine:

And that's when I had to say, okay, it's time to make a change. And then I took a mental toll on me to where I was. Okay. I think I deserve a life that's more than this.

Melissa:

I am so excited to bring you our guest for today, jasmine Griffin. From the bustling and competitive world of New York City's fashion industry to building her own thriving floral business, kind of formal, jasmine's journey is truly something special. Her story is filled with experiences that I'm sure will resonate with each and every one of us. I feel incredibly fortunate to have her here with us, generously sharing her adventures. So, without keeping you waiting any longer, let's jump right into the fabulous journey of Jasmine. Let's just, like, go with the flow, see where it leads us.

Melissa:

Like I said, I am very excited to talk to you, I think more selfishly, because, like after I bought the flowers from you, because you briefly mentioned your story, saying like, oh, this is like your third venture, and, like you know, you made the pivot. And I was telling my friend like, oh, I met this girl and she's like now doing on our own and she just didn't want to be trapped in corporate. And I was like, and she was like, yes, me too. So, anyways, I just want to know and kind of see if I can glean any insights from you as well. So why don't we dive in? Maybe just take us to the beginning. Where are you from?

Jasmine:

I'm from San Antonio, texas, born and raised. I left San Antonio at 20 to move to New York for college. Yeah, my whole life I've lived in the same zip code, essentially until I moved my adult life to New York.

Melissa:

Yeah, so you said you moved in here for college. I did so. I was at FIT I started.

Jasmine:

I did community college here because I was very overwhelmed with the responsibility of going to this well known private school that had a fashion program in town and I was just like that makes no sense for me to do this when I don't really want to go here. I think I actually want to move to New York and I'm so glad that I followed my gut and, ok, I'm just going to tough it out for two years and go to college for free, essentially and then I transferred to FIT.

Melissa:

What were you like as a kid?

Jasmine:

I beat to my own drum. I never felt the pressure to I wouldn't say it never, but I wasn't really trying to do what everyone else is doing to where I would feel bad about myself. I felt like that was a narrative. I saw a lot as a kid like around me of people really trying to fit in and I just was like I'm really different. All my siblings are sports guys. I tried. I was like let me try the sports thing. It wasn't me. I rather paint in my mom's garage, hand-sew articles of clothing. I was just doing like whatever felt good and making stuff felt really right. So my parents were like, hey, she's not going to be playing sports, ok, let's get her an art set, so that's what they did.

Melissa:

So I mean going back to college now, because you said you you're pursuing fashion in college. Was there anything that you had, an experience or some sort of influence that kind of inspired you to pursue fashion?

Jasmine:

Yeah, I'd say I grew up in a very conservative I would some people would describe it as a cult religious sect of Christianity to where it really put a limit on what I could wear and how I could be perceived to the world. So I was like everyone else is wearing these long jeans skirts to an angle. I don't want to wear jeans skirts. I'm going to make a skirt that's not a jeans skirt, or play within the rules, I would say, but still make it feel true to myself. But that makes any sense.

Jasmine:

So I think that influenced my love for fashion and I remember getting a job and getting Teen Vogue and loving just putting stuff together on my Pinterest. I have to play within these lines, so I'm going to make it as cool as I can. So, yeah, I think that was my influence. And then my brothers were always asking me for fashion tips and they were like, hey, does this go together? They were just coming to me and they knew that I had interest in it. At college in San Antonio, I worked for a tailor and that's when I started to learn the seamstress stuff. If you want this to fit right, you need to go to the tailor and play around and it became really fun for me to make things work.

Melissa:

I mean, I guess I'm curious to know, like with expressing yourself through fashion, what did you feel like was at stake? If you couldn't do that Like, why not just wear what everyone else is wearing Like? Why did you feel like it was so important to you at that time to express yourself through your clothes?

Jasmine:

One thing I didn't want to be so to me was that I was boring. That sounds really lame, but I was just like what was at stake was my autonomy, I think, and knowing that I had to fit into this box to get by because of my household and what we did, because we're super into church and everything. This is what we do. So, to make this feel more fun and not so boring, I'm going to do it my way, but I'm going to do it enough of my way, but enough of your way, to where I wouldn't get in trouble.

Melissa:

So yeah, did you ever get any pushback from that, like whether it's your parents or friends or just people around you? Yeah, so when?

Jasmine:

I moved away, I started dressing differently and not wearing skirts all the time and got my ears pierced at like I don't know.

Jasmine:

I was like 23 when I got my ears pierced for the first time. There's just so many constraints and my mom was just like you're a god, you could do whatever you want. But I think me being a little bit more courageous kind of helped all of us be a bit more courageous and eventually leave the church that we are all raised in and went to and kind of like do what works for you, and I think that's where we all are now.

Melissa:

Wow, so even your parents left too, yeah.

Jasmine:

So my parents are divorced, so my dad had left that established, yes, the church like years prior and yeah, my mom did too. I mean, they still go to church, but not in the same legalistic way of. This is what you wear. You can't go to the movies and all that kind of stuff. You can't drink all that stuff.

Melissa:

Wow, did you like? Did you and your mom ever have a formal conversation about that, about like leaving and changing your ways in that way?

Jasmine:

Yeah, I guess my mom I was, I did. I was kind of like, mom, I don't want to go to this type of church anymore when I moved and I was just like I don't want to do this. So I found this one church that I like. It's way different and I like it. And she was always like OK, as long as you feel like your soul is OK, then do what you need to do. So there was enough of a release to just OK, I'd pray for you in this room.

Jasmine:

And you're in God's hand, kind of how she handled it.

Melissa:

Did you ever wonder why, like your mom I mean now I'm like, oh, I want to talk to your mom again why your mom wanted to like, felt like she like how does she become a part of this? And then felt the need to stay a part of this community.

Jasmine:

I don't know. I think it was a thing about the 80s and being on a party culture and a lot of people you know saying, ah, this isn't the best way to live. So I think people kind of did an over exaggerated turn to seek out something that was a completely different lifestyle to what they were doing. So I think that's really what. And then, ok, it's all consuming. Then. So, and then we had other family members that had gotten saved and we're like, hey, you want to come with me to church? My parents were like, yeah, but they were partying like everybody else in the 80s. And then they were like, ok, we need to have a lifestyle change. Yes, they're ranting Exactly yeah.

Melissa:

Did you lose a lot of friends when you left the church or that particular church?

Jasmine:

Oh yeah, like it's not as bad for me because I don't live here, but it's really bad for my siblings even still. Yeah, they're. They're definitely ostracized and people have been unkind.

Melissa:

That's crazy. I used to actually work at a church and I remember when, like, things were just not good at the church and you know having to either you know kind of like bring it up or you know eventually leaving the church. I think what was surprising, like what would hurt the most about that experience, was a loss of the community, because you know, anyone who goes to church knows like it's because you go a big part of why you go as a people and you get so close, and then it's like these people who are so close and you know are kind of like your family, and then they turn your back on you. I feel like I don't know.

Melissa:

I just like that is the heart part of that whole, like experience of leaving a religion or leaving a community. So yeah, oh yeah.

Jasmine:

Definitely. I think that I exactly the same thing.

Melissa:

Mm, hmm.

Jasmine:

The same. I think the longing that I think my family is felt is for that sense of community for sure yeah.

Melissa:

So when you then pursued fashion in college, and then, what gave you the impetus to move to New York, to make such a huge change like that?

Jasmine:

It was probably the city, the show, the city, oh I was like Manhattan.

Jasmine:

Yes, I was so in love with the show the Hills and the city and I loved Kelly Catrone. I read her book and then I was like I want to go to the city because there are so many things about her and about the way she was just kind of dry and I felt that way to. I was like this is a have to be emotional, let's just get it done, you know. And there's just such a curiosity. And so then when I was 20 and I was like I do not want to go to in current word, I took all the classes I could take at this community college. My mom wanted me to go to university of Texas it's just an Austin. I had another fashion program. Don't really want to go there, but I will go there if I have to. If I don't get into FIT, I'll go there. And I was doing a lot of research because I had gotten into all these summer programs at Parsons and was the other one. There was a fashion school and I could tie and forget what it's called now because it's been 15 years. But I didn't apply for anything for FIT. But in my research I found that FIT is a state school and it was so much less expensive and there is a lot of public fashion figures that have gone there and had success. I was like this makes the most sense.

Jasmine:

Logically, I had my own job and I was still living at home and I'd saved up enough money. And I told my mom like probably two weeks prior, mom, I'm going to New York on Saturday, and I asked one of my friends to drive me to the airport and she was like you're not going to New York. I was like I am already purchased my ticket, I already have a hotel, and this was just me going to visit the college and see if I liked New York. I did it by myself and she was like no, you're not going. I was like I'm going and she was like kind of panicked and I was like, okay, I love you, I'm going by. And she was like oh my gosh. And so she panicked and she called my eldest brother and at the time my brother was a youth pastor still at the church that we were going to and so he had like a flexible schedule. So she was like hey, if I buy you a ticket.

Jasmine:

Will you please go with Jasmine? I don't want her to be by herself. And I was like this is great because, like me and my brother are so close.

Jasmine:

I was like this is yeah like why didn't you pay for mine too? It was great. And so we said, formally known as the Pennsylvania Inn, on the number 33rd and 7th Ave Disgusting, it was beautiful. I was like this is the sick hotel. In the hall, the lobby, the lobby. And then we got to the room FIT, so good job.

Jasmine:

And I was like I think I think I want to do this and so I applied what about it? I just one thing about FIT is I just loved the, the campus, and how it felt like a campus, even though it's only a street from seven to eight. I loved, like the people that had met, and I had also met this person that was also in like the Macy's fashion program and she's still my friend now, but she had was a bit far further along and she had gone to UT. So I was like, okay, she was like, if you can do it, do it. So she really encouraged me and I was like, okay, I'm going to do it. And so I tried and I applied. I thought was in the summer of 2011 and by January 2012, like six months later, I was like in New York, living there.

Melissa:

Wow, and I like moved with.

Jasmine:

I remember like 1000 bucks and two suitcases I thought I had. Tuition was not paid. It's just like a weekend prayer and it kind of worked itself out.

Melissa:

Yeah, do you remember what you were feeling at that time? Like, right, as you're preparing to make that move, like just I don't know the you know the fears or even just the hope of what you are hoping to create by making this move. You know for your life, I mean what? Do you remember what you were feeling at that time?

Jasmine:

Being a florist. I go to 28th street all the time and I always walk down 27th on purpose to remember I, oh my gosh, I was so afraid, but I was trying to be courageous and sticking to my guts and my instincts. I don't think I'm supposed to be in Texas in a long time, sorry. I'm extremely emotional thinking about it and I think there's so much value of really listening to yourself and that's what I did. I I was afraid of survival, but I wasn't survival meaning like money, like how am I going to pay my bills, like pay my school bill? But I wasn't necessarily afraid of the world. I was like hungry to like understand the world better, because the world was so small. I'm in Texas and I was like I really want my world to be bigger, I want to see different people. I was just like so, so hungry for something different.

Melissa:

Yeah, so then, what was your first year in New York like? Now that you kind of made the venture to New York and you're doing it?

Jasmine:

I felt like when you're a big fish in a small pond I was a small fish in a big pond in New York I thought I was cool and I was like, no, but I was like you don't care about cool. And so I then I was like, okay, I don't, I just like want to feel like at ease and like in my own skin and yeah kind of.

Jasmine:

at first I felt so uncomfortable because I was like I don't know all the cool stuff. And then I was just like whatever, like you don't have to know, like that's better, that's like less pretentious and like more I don't know, like it's so much more. There's a word I'm looking for relatable not to know. Like you know you're not trying to be that girl or you know just like whatever. Like I'll figure it out.

Melissa:

I feel like also in New York, like you know, you quickly find out like just no one cares, Everyone's so busy, that's true. But like in, college you're like.

Jasmine:

All your friends are also coming from like the Midwest or Long Island and you're like, oh my God, I'm trying to at least make friends. And then I was just like whatever, like by year two I was like, nah, it's like you don't need to dress up to go to class Like you can wear sweatpants. But like the first year, you're dressing up.

Melissa:

Well, I was gonna say I was like fashion school must be so intimidating, because I feel like when I would see kids at FIT or like these other design schools, they always look so cool and I was like, gosh, how do these people put these outfits together?

Jasmine:

So cool, I thought the same thing. That's like what was probably the most intimidating thing is like like nobody cares, Just like get the degree, then you can get a job. Like that's like where my instincts kind of changed of like how I was perceived, to like why I was actually there.

Melissa:

So so you did, you get a job in fashion right out of college. I did.

Jasmine:

Yeah, it was a long fun summer without a job and then I got a job. And then I got a job that August. Yeah, I worked in like when women's ready to wear, so most of the jobs I got were related to fabric or production.

Melissa:

And what was that like working in New York city.

Jasmine:

Like Devil Wears Prada. I was like Publicly humiliated so many times I had like are you? Yeah, I was bad I. This is why I was not in fashion.

Melissa:

Yeah it was insane.

Jasmine:

It was really insane. I had like one person that was like out to get me and I'm convinced she would like be like didn't you go to school for fashion? And she was like a Mom. She was literally like my mom's age and had like kids of her own also in college I was like why do you wait?

Melissa:

okay, I know that fashion, the fashion industry, is like notorious for being cutthroat and like it's really hard to work in fashion. Why are they like that?

Jasmine:

They want to climb to the top. I think that's what it is, and it's like a rat race to the top. Like what can we do? What can I do to, like, make myself look better than you and Will it get me a better position?

Melissa:

Okay, I barely know you but, like you know, from the moment I met you, you're very warm and kind, so I'm just like Clearly said this this wasn't your jam. Like that is not your energy. Um, so how did you navigate through that? Like, how do you keep your sanity or, like you know, kind of maintain your, your core through an environment like that?

Jasmine:

I think after my first job. which the culture there was like there was not everyone was mean, it was really one person that was mean, I should say. And what I would do, like what I did after that job, it was just like really thinking about, like what do I want, like Beyond a job, like what am I after? And I've always asked myself for that. But I Knew that I didn't want to work till 11 pm Every day, have lunch with or have dinner with these people and then take a car home at night which, like all of my counterparts were doing. That I was like I'm the fabric department, like for ready to wear. What do I, what do I need to do? Like being here at 11 pm Like huh, I'm not sewing anything. Like what are we doing? Okay, it was just everyone was spinning. Now it's like this is ridiculous. I figured out that I value quality of life.

Melissa:

More than.

Jasmine:

I value like being perceived as like a fashion girly. Like I want to be a home at six. I want to like go out to dinner with my friends. I Like want it to be able to travel, to text, to see my family or go on vacation. Like that's what I I Valued more of. Like the relational outside of work than I did like being a slave to the job.

Jasmine:

I mean and so I got all my other jobs, like you know, having that in the back of my head and I was like, oh, this is not a good fit, this is not a good fit. And I was like you know what I think I I tried my hardest. I think that, like I've tried enough places to know that, like the culture of fashion is not for me. Like Fabric, like fabric was fun and I like love that, I have a skill set and I could do many things, but it just wasn't for me. Yeah, I don't think I care enough. I Don't care about the same things. Like I just don't value, like clothes, just what's on you. You put it on. Like who you are is what matters, and I don't think people like had that, like I don't. I really don't think most people understand that this is just like threads, like it's meaningless.

Jasmine:

Nobody cares about fashion and Like. In a way, that's life or death. Like it's not life or death.

Melissa:

It's not and I think when it's treated as such.

Jasmine:

It's like really, really dangerous Because it's that's like not a real thing. Like what matters is like the world and how you're treating people and If people are eating and healthier, are you okay? Like that's what matters, and I wasn't in environments that also valued that.

Melissa:

You know asking yourself the question of what do I want? And then realizing for yourself. It is a quality of life, it is relationships. And then you know being in a place like New York City, where it really, you know, so much of the air here is, you know, status, money, what are you doing? And it's you know. Then you niche down to fashion. It's like even more of that, like, did you like, did you feel at that point Lost, or how is this possible? Or just like? I don't know, that's gotta feel so counter cultural to what's going on around you.

Jasmine:

I think my family is really grounding, because I would come home Like on vacation and I'd be like sitting on the table and I was listening to my brother's conversations. My brothers are both teachers and one of them is a barber, so I have to like Educational they're not teachers teachers anymore but at the time they were and I was listening to their stories and how much joy they had in like Helping these kids and like laughing about how hilarious it was, like just different stories and I was like, oh, I think I want that. I want to have some joy around my job and Know that like I'm, I'm actually contributing to like the greater good in someone's life and I think fashion can be that. But I don't know if everyone's as thoughtful in Trying to achieve that. You know, I don't know if I'm answering your question. I'm sorry.

Melissa:

No, no, it's good, and I think I mean really what I'm, I think, getting at is like there is such a feeling of keeping up with the Joneses in New York, you know, and so like, how, like, I guess, like, how do you navigate?

Jasmine:

I was like making less than $20 an hour, there is no way I was gonna keep up with the Joneses. I Remember having like $30 for groceries after I paid my rent. So it was like here's the Joneses, like I didn't really matter. I know there's a person in fashion that would give me free clothes. So I was like doing enough. I was like, okay, I have friends that are helping me stay clothed and cool enough to get these fashion jobs. I was just like whatever, like I'll never keep up with. People will always have more than me and that's okay. I was like I've already done this Previously and like religious settings, I don't necessarily need to do this with my career. I.

Melissa:

Love that, that, that connection. So, in terms of finding your, the joy in your job, how did you then make the pivot at that?

Jasmine:

so I was going to another church and I had a friend that was like an administrator at a school in New York and I was like, okay, I Started working at the last fashion job. I actually enjoyed, but I was like there was some management changes. I was like I think this is like an urge for me to get out of this. And I Was talking to other friends. I had close friends that also looked at the same school. You know, it's like like how do you like it? They're like yeah, I like it, it's fun and I have a good time and I like the people I work with and I was like cool, where do I sign up? I like just again, like I'm not necessarily afraid to make a change and try something, like I just kind of Felt like what's the worst that could happen. So I reached out to her. I had one interview and I got the job, and just a teaching job.

Jasmine:

I was a teacher's assistant and it was just like a completely different. It was all because I heard my brothers in a conversation about how they loved education and I and Just to give you some background, my grandparents were teachers, my uncle the teacher. Unlike, we just have like a lot of family and like educators. So I was like this felt like inevitable and I had always wanted to get a master's in Education. Just because I was like like my mom kind of wanted us all to get our masters. And I don't know, when you're a POC, I feel like your parents are like okay, great, anyone can get a bachelor's. But like, go this step, like set yourself apart and get more education.

Melissa:

I'm sure you're familiar with yeah, you always have to do the best. You can't be the same as everyone else. You have to be the best or better, under 30 and so I did it.

Jasmine:

I was like I had. I was a new person at the school and I like just kept on asking my principal like, hey, I want to do this program. I want to do this program and I knew that you got paid. More has gone from like working in fashion like you know, entry level but like Not so entry at that point and Then going to be a teacher's assistant in New York City it was the drastic I was making half as much money to where I was like cool, how am I gonna survive? So I was like I got a huffle and so I was like babysitting and Teachers assistant and then I later on that year I got into the program and started the program.

Melissa:

Did you find that joy in teaching those years I?

Jasmine:

found a joy in kids like I think there was something so pure about Some of the kids that I worked with um To where it was impossible not to feel joy and it was an impossible not to laugh and also Knowing that, like this is the hardest job I've ever done but it's for the great purpose. That was enough to keep me going and I did it, for I quit my sixth year. Yeah, I did for five years.

Melissa:

Are you at that point feeling, you know, at all Discouraged or, I don't know, just kind of like down? Because and I think maybe I, you know for me that question I'm projecting my own feelings on to you because I think I, I guess sometimes, where I Compare myself to others, it's like, oh, I, sometimes I just see people and they've been in this, like you know, I'm 35 now. So I see people I'm like, oh, they've been in their careers like 10, 15 years, and this is like what they do. And like I'm ex, I'm this, you know, and you know. So much of my story too is like Similar, like where I resonate a lot with what you, what you're saying, is like I've also never been too like afraid to make Changes if, like if it needed to be, or like be stuck in a boxer because I was supposed to do something.

Jasmine:

I was like, why is this so hard for me? Why is this so hard for me? And like my other friends, they did it with such ease and I was like Barely making it. Like you know how sometimes your body tells you to like. I mean, there's I think everyone's heard the book. Like your body keeps the score. Yeah, yeah Again. Like I have to remind myself of my core of like I'm not really trying to Fit into what works for you, I'm trying to figure out what works for me. And like I have like I'm kind of like about that of like, okay, this isn't working.

Jasmine:

And I at the time I was in therapy and I was like Warning that because I thought that I was gonna be a teacher for life, I thought that this was gonna be my career, I thought that I would be happy.

Jasmine:

I was like, oh, I'm ready to buy a house, I'm ready to like make these moves. Because I was working at a school that was like wasn't Terribly paying us, like it was like I was finally making like more money than I've ever made and like coming into my. But I was not happy and I was like it felt worse to Stay longer, to get that feeling of like establishment and and to I mean then to like really project like my unhappiness onto kids, like they didn't deserve that. I didn't want to like let my disposition of not being and feeling as I wanted to feel like happy and joy. I didn't want that to ruin their education. I was like, yeah, it's not yeah. And then also I got really sick, so, so sick to where I like took a medical leave and that was like the wake up call I needed to be like this can't happen anymore. So yeah.

Melissa:

What was happening at this school? Oh my God.

Jasmine:

You wouldn't believe me yeah.

Melissa:

Wow.

Jasmine:

It was just really stressful. You saw like that humanity of people that you didn't think was possible, like I just didn't think people this was like real about like a movie most of the time. Like I think it really hit me. When I got hit Like a kid was like throwing stuff at me and I literally had to leave the room because I was like crying because I couldn't do anything about it. I was like this kid is mad for no reason. I didn't do anything wrong. I call their parents. They're cursing me out to threatening me. And it was like I was getting threatened all the time too.

Jasmine:

So, like that stress of like oh my gosh, it's today, the day that I'm going to walk outside and get my ass beat, like that's. I would like I had one friend Like hey, can you talk to me until I get to the train. Because I was like too, there's like some people we're not like infamous parents that were like known to beat people up, and I was like like their child did not have a good day today. I'm not trying to get beat up. And then my husband was like we got to like they get this out, because I can feel your students in the walls of our apartment, like it was like really, it was really like the darkness was like tearing me apart of, like trying so hard with everything I had, but it was just like not working and like administration, I wouldn't say like everyone, but I would say that like my direct supervisor would like be like tell the principal, don't tell me, I don't want to know. Now it's like but it's your job and you're making three times more than me.

Jasmine:

And it was just like and you can include this because I like I hope she sees no, um, it was just like really sick. We had everything that we needed to make people's lives easier, all of the funding in the world. We had endowments that were bigger than private schools in New York City, universities in New York City. We had a huge endowment and we just like I wouldn't say we, I would say people just didn't care. And I was like we can send these kids to counseling, we have the money Like what are you? What are you trying to protect? And I think that was like my turning point because.

Jasmine:

I was like, okay, I got into this to like help others through education. I love math, I was a math teacher. I love math and science, love it. I loved teaching it. Teaching wasn't the problem, it was like the relation part, it was the system, it was getting children help.

Jasmine:

That a lot of people like just like turned over and like didn't care. I literally will never forget someone, like not just once, like several times, from like vice principal, assistant principal, being like tell the principal, don't tell me, I don't want to know. Because if I, because if they know they have to do something about it. So they are like no, don't tell me. So like what do you do? And you can't even go to your boss and someone's getting abused or her, or are spacing all these challenges inside and outside of school. What do you do? It's completely helpless. I'm now, I'm not even doing what I came here to do. I can't. I can't really do my job and I can't really help these students. So like I think it's time for me to go because you guys aren't helping either.

Melissa:

So how, what were you doing at that time when you decided you're going to leave teaching and you needed to heal and kind of process through what you just experienced? Like, what did that time look like for you to kind of get back to your state of like neutrality?

Jasmine:

I like had to seek a psychiatrist to figure out like finding medicine or whatever, and I was like, oh no, I don't want to. I was afraid of medicine. My therapist was, like, do what you do. But like, yeah, you're gonna be like how can we get you out of this situation? And still, I was feeling terrible, like I felt awful, and then we had to move out of our apartment. We wanted to move out of our apartment. It was all at the end of summer, right before I went back to school, so I was moving out of our apartment.

Jasmine:

I came back from your appealing completely awful and I had been applying for jobs that entire last year of me working and I had one job that I like really wanted out of school. That was in Brooklyn and like a walkable distance. I was like, oh, this is great, like I love this, I was qualified for it. I interviewed three or four times for the job and then the day of my like final group interview with like eight people, I completely like blocked and I also just like I think I had like a nervous breakdown, like I felt like nothing. It was so strange and it was about time for me to go back to school.

Jasmine:

And then same week my husband lost his job and I was like everything is falling apart and I cannot go back to work. I can't do it. Like I felt like I had lost my mind. I felt like so disconnected I couldn't sleep. I didn't sleep for three months. So all during Europe, I was like maybe it's just because I am having like jet lag. No, I didn't sleep at all. I didn't sleep for three months. So, and then my gut was starting to react to it and I had previously had have spent a lot of time at the gastro. So everything was kind of just not working.

Jasmine:

And I was. I told my boss, I was like I'm so sorry, but I have to take leave because I am not well enough to be back in front of kids. Like I'm not, I'm not well enough for this. And I didn't want to quit because, like I felt like they owed me something, they put me through hell. Like I felt like I really deserved a bit more than what I got. So I was like you know what? I'm going to go on a health leave, because I had like not slept.

Jasmine:

I was now in that, I was now medicated and I was like I'm trying to like figure out how to keep like food in my belly without like having chronic pain. So I get approval. So I'm now on a leave. So I spent six months essentially not at work. I'm going to go from the end of summer all the way to December. I'm going to do everything I can to heal my mind and my body. And I was me getting my medication.

Jasmine:

I started to see an acupuncturist that like helps me with sleep, helped my tummy to like calm down, and I was like in doctor's appointments, like four in a week, like I was just doing everything I can because I was still on the school's insurance. It was awesome. So I got well enough. And then I was like, oh yeah, I'm not going back to like that old life with like this stress and how it was affecting my marriage, affecting everything about me. I was like absolutely not, I can't do it.

Jasmine:

My therapist we were doing a lot of work together and she was like, okay, what would your day look like if you could have your ideal life? What would it look like? And like we did this exercise a lot and I was explaining kind of what I do now and she was like why don't you just try. Why don't you try Like make yourself a portfolio? So I like made like a really funny looking portfolio and I just like put myself out there. I sent a bunch of emails to people that like work in flowers, because at this time I was like I think I want to work in hospitality but like I want to do like party planning or flowers or something. And I was consistently doing this for like my friends, for other parties, like on the side, not working in it really like, just for fun.

Jasmine:

And so I sent my portfolio to one forest. That's like I would call her like a legacy forest, because her mom is a forest and she's like really awesome and she like like gave me a job. So I had enough experience, but I had, I guess, more hunger and thirst to like learn.

Melissa:

Mm. So the the forest, because it sounds like you know you have a lot of like a diverse range of skills and curiosities, as well as creative kind of expressions, like in terms of kind of landing to, you know, on being a florist, like what about being a florist made you really feel like this is, this is where, like, I feel like I'm in, you know, like where I want to be.

Jasmine:

I think it was like the piece I felt around it and how, even when it wasn't my job, I was still like doing exercising exercises, like buying a ton of flowers and just like arranging.

Melissa:

So how does one launch a floral business?

Jasmine:

I don't know, I'm still figuring it out.

Melissa:

Where are we in the timeline? Is this one? Is this a year ago? Two years ago?

Jasmine:

Two years ago. By now, yeah so okay, okay.

Jasmine:

How does one launch? I would say I just I tried to use all my resources that were free. I tried to do as much learning on my own, as much as I could, and I worked insistently with the florist that I really admired I still work with her, she's amazing. And then I kind of like became friends with a couple people that I admired their work, cause some people gatekeep and they didn't, and they were like hey, like there's enough flowers to go around to, where, like they, there can be work for you and there could be work for me. And it's like everyone's eating, we're okay, and so I like, kind of always you know, do everything under that guy.

Jasmine:

So, yeah, working as much as I can, freelancing, and then I would start picking up smaller gigs on my own that were like okay, six tables, some bud basses, edpd, this isn't hard and it kind of like getting like going into the water really, really slowly.

Jasmine:

You know when you're like trying to get your bearing um but consistently like not never being like oh, I'm not freelancing anymore, because freelancing is like your bed, bread and butter, like that's how you learn, like how did you think that? A bigger scale. And I learned in doing all of that. I don't necessarily want to do these huge weddings, like it's that's not like where I want my business to come from, but I like to learn that scale, you know. So I'm learning what I liked, I'm learning what I didn't like, I'm learning learning why. I'm learning how to buy flowers and like where I go.

Jasmine:

I was just learning as much as possible, asking as many questions as possible, and that's kind of how that started. It also helped that my husband had an LLC that he was doing design work under and we're like, okay, like we can use the same LLC to do like do business as kind of formal, and he like so happens to also does branding, like we kind of are very much so cut from the same cloth as we like we'd like to do many things. So we have like a bunch of crazy, like you know, skill sets and we're just like we don't have to do just one thing. That's like one thing that we're like really positive about. We're like love that.

Jasmine:

Like we're never those people, like we're going to do like 50 things and we're okay with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was just like happening little by little and like Evan was like oh, like he had a lot of vision for what the brick, like the concept beyond just the flowers, was, so that kind of helped with our branding and those aspects. And then it also helped that my mother in law is our accountant and so she helped me with like the role and tax things.

Jasmine:

Yes, so it's like honing into like every resource we had, and then I would, I was like, okay, how do I price these? So other going to other floors to, and being like, okay, what's like, how do I get this? Like, and they're like, this is how you do this, and then so I oh, you would just call florist and they'll help you with that, I would get people's opinion of like hey, this is what I want to do, like, if this makes sense.

Jasmine:

I'd be like no go lower, go higher, you know, just like friends that I've had met and they were just like kind about, like I see helping me out, because they knew that I want it this to be like my full time thing after working as a teacher for so long, and I didn't like popping up ever since and doing events.

Melissa:

So yeah, Wow. So in terms of a practical question, like you know, when you're kind of getting your business off the ground and like how do you kind of like make up for maybe the the pay is not going to quite be exactly what you were making before you have a family to provide for Like how do you yeah, how did you manage that, or like make that leap? I'm sure that was.

Jasmine:

Yeah, I didn't really have a, I guess, a goal set of like a figure of how much money I wanted to make. I just knew that I wanted to be able to make at least the same amount as I did as a teacher, because I knew that, like right now, we had like the same quality of life. We didn't need to like make it, we didn't need to be like bougie or anything, I just like wanted to like stay where we were maintain it. Yeah, I'm not trying to like be crazy.

Jasmine:

I was just like you know, and I think what really helped was like I had friends that worked in like entertainment industry, that are producers, and like reaching out and being like, hey, this is what I'm doing now and I have a friend be like, oh, okay, great, oh, I've to my vendors list and other people that like yeah, so that really really helped to where in this last year, I made more than I did than, like you know, being a teacher.

Jasmine:

So like I definitely had to adjust to like having really quiet months Um but, like knowing that and like having had the background in fashion with freelance, knowing that you can't spend all your money at once. You got to save because you don't know when the next job is coming. Um.

Jasmine:

I relanced all through my fashion career and I was like, okay, I have to, you know, save as much money as possible so that we can pay myself, pay us, I guess, a salary that is like comparable to when I was, what I was making as teacher and, like you know, have some stored up for the cold months.

Melissa:

I'm thinking you know so many people. I feel like we'll resonate with what you're saying because I think, a lot of the times, a lot of us are in jobs or in places that are we're out of there for necessity and it's, you know, even though it's really hard and terrible, or whatever our range of experiences are with, you know, working these jobs that we don't love. Um, I think I think people like you know hearing your sort like that's the dream, it's like, oh, and then, like I launched my own business and I love it and you know it's I'm doing well now and you know, and I you know to your point before, like there is. I do feel like there is enough for everyone, where, like that is possible for everyone. Um, was it hard? Like, I guess, how did you?

Melissa:

I feel like, oh sorry, so many, so many questions wrapped up in this one question, which is, like, growing up, we're kind of conditioned to like go to school, go to school, go to school, like you said, you went to school to get a job, you go to school, you get a job. I mean, now that you're, you know, this is a totally different lifestyle where you're now fishing for what you eat. Um, like, how are you kind of like, what did it take to like shift your mindset, to like feel like this is something I can rely on, cause even for me, where I have some like side hustles or businesses running that leap definitely feels very destabilizing to then go from corporate paycheck to now like I don't know if I'm going to get another job next month, you know. So how do you advise someone through that?

Jasmine:

This is the answer you want, but I trust God and I trust that I'll always be taking care of. That is like my story. I didn't come to New York with anything. There's been times where I'm like literally surviving off of $30 for a week of food. It's like I just kind of feel like if it's meant to work out that it will no matter what and that's not like a great like financial advice. It's just that's not. It's like.

Jasmine:

It's really like, oh you know, but it's just, it's just my truth, it's what I really stand 10 toes down on is like I really truly believe that what you need will come and stay positive, stay looking, stay hungry and like sometimes you have to figure out a way to get what you want and do it in the best way possible and not to hurt anyone else. But like, okay, I literally started doing pop ups because I didn't know how I was going to make money in February and March. So I was like, okay, I'm going to pop up outside of my apartment with flowers and see how it goes. Yeah.

Melissa:

So you know, kind of a segue into you know what is enough. I really love what you're saying about that, about that what we get is enough, and there's just always this openness, like I guess, like, how do you? I think it's it's tricky because as a business, as a business owner and someone who you know as a business, you need to make a profit and how do you manage yourself in terms of whether it's like hustling or grinding or going out to find the work you need to do without? I don't know, I guess, with balancing, with what is enough? You know, because, like what, if you're like hustling and grinding and you're like, but I also do have enough, or I don't know, like I guess what comes to mind when I say that, um, doing what feels the most natural, like that's how I kind of operate.

Jasmine:

I I operate based off of my gut and I, even when I have like a really amazing month where it's like, oh, okay, I made enough money to last me for the rest of the year based off my budget, now, um, still being like, okay, there's opportunity for growth in this area, like, what does that look like for me? And for me, that in the last two months, that's what's like going into random restaurants that are opening on my street and being like, hey, I do flowers, just wondering if you ever need like weeklies. Here's my card. Really, nice to meet you. I do that. Um, I don't think that hurts anything. And it's like I sometimes give flowers away to other businesses and I'm like, hey, I have extra. Like, if you ever need any more, let me know.

Jasmine:

You know, I like try to do that as much as possible. I think also not having like closed hands to people and things like just yeah, I think one thing I learned from my mom um, we always might I mean, I told you my parents got a divorce, um but our house I literally always say that it was like an orphanage cause we always had or I used to call this, it's terrible to say, but it was like a shelter cause we had so many people living with us.

Jasmine:

It was like my immediate family and then it was like this random ladies from church that just like needed help or needed a place to stay while they live into their next place, or like just someone that was in need.

Jasmine:

Like I remember my mom literally having one income, getting us all cars and my cousin cars like I don't know how she did it. And then somehow also like having my brother ran track in college and like the whole track team came over after church like every Sunday. There's like 20 dudes in my house and I was like how are you going to do this? And I think that's really where I learned my skill set of like hospitality is cause I learned it from my mom and I think I've been learned hospitality from his mom and just be like it's going to come, it's going to work out with what we have, and it always did. And so I guess I might be delusional and I think I am a little bit, but I definitely I definitely learned from like seeing my mom just be a very generous person when she had a lot and when she didn't have anything. I don't think you're delusional at all.

Melissa:

And I think, like, um, there are, like you know, people who I know who have that same like mindset and mantra about life, and just an openness, um, I, they've tapped into something you know like energy, energy, like you know the energies and vibes and those things where it feels so woo and not tangible. And not tangible Like okay, like save X amount of dollars, and then you do this and that, but you know, I think so much of what you're saying, of like what is your feeling, tapping into your gut, like how does this feel to me? And you know, having an openness, I think that is so powerful but it's easy to knock because it is hard to grasp or hard to explain or just kind of like hand it over to you, you know, um, but I do feel there's so much power in that I do it with discretion.

Jasmine:

Cause I've learned the hard way a lot of giving my pearls to pigs. Um, I have oftentimes been the person that people like everyone wants to come to a party, right, like, but not everybody wants to go through like the tough times with you, and I definitely learned that the hard way with a lot of relationships, um, just having like people really close and just having like people really close and then things get really hard and you're like meeting someone to lean on and you can't lean on them and I think so what I give, I give with discretion.

Melissa:

Yeah, okay. Well, just to wrap things up, um, I asked my guests two questions, all the same questions, so um first question is what do you do for play or for fun, is it?

Jasmine:

so lame. Okay, there's a couple of things I do for fun. I play games on my phone.

Melissa:

I also looked Love that I also look for flowers that are on deals. So my last question to you is what would you tell your younger self?

Jasmine:

The Spanish thing. The only thing that comes to mind is Bokoa, bokoa. It's like slowly, slowly, um, just it's okay and I would tell I wouldn't change a thing. I don't think I mean except for my student debt. I still have college where I did. I would still. I don't think that I could do my job now without having every background job that I've had, because and I think that's valuable I had someone tell me, um, another thing. I would have told myself that someone told me they're like nothing you ever do was wasted, so like even though it was like happened really slowly, like it's okay Because, like it's valuable. Now, like I could say that I'm in school for fashion business. Fashion business has helped me to like plan how to mark something up, and I was a math teacher, so that has helped me to plan and to I don't know quantify everything to do with like flowers and numbers and how much I need for something.

Jasmine:

It's also helped me with like relating to people and being open to like other people asking me like hey, like, tell me about your job, Cause I'm interested about it. So it's like and it's gonna be the ability, also be honest Like. I think, that helped me with education. I have to be honest with people and so, yeah, I think that I would say slowly, slowly it's okay, but everything's happened slowly it's it wasn't. I'm a slow cooker, I'm not into the pot, so okay, I love that.

Melissa:

Well, that is the end of the recording. Thank you so much for making the time and sharing your story. I really I just love so much of what you said and how you think about things and just your spirit and your openness. I mean, this was, this was definitely a special conversation, so I just really appreciate you just sharing and opening up with me. Yeah, thank you for listening. Remember there's no one way or one size fits all, so join me next week. I have another very special conversation I want to share with you. Bye.